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Reviews of Films I Have Never Seen:
THE LAST STAND – Cartel Next of Kin Mar Shoot ‘Em Up

Kim Ji-woon, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Johnny Knoxville, The Last Stand, Movie, Kim Ji-woon, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Johnny Knoxville, The Last Stand, Movie,

 
Director Kim Ji-woon directs Arnold Schwarzenegger in The Last Stand, a tale of redemption and rough justice that should be hotter than the barrel of a 9mm.

Working from a script by only three writers (Andrew Knauer, Jeffrey Nachmanoff and George Nolfi if you must know), Kim helms what might’ve been a slam dunk action movie pitting a failed cop against powerful drug king Gabriel Cortez (Eduardo Noriega).

Fleeing the FBI, Cortez is driving a tricked out Nissan Leaf, traveling at speeds exceeding 50 mph. As he and his gang head for the border they must first pass through Sommerton Junction, a small town rich in citizens who are both heavily armed and silly.

Fired from the LAPD for a bungled drug bust as well as smoking a cigarette in city limits, Ray Owens (Schwarzenegger) is Sommerton’s top cop. From here, you should be able to relax and enjoy the fun as Owens rallies his rag tag deputies to man up and duke it out with Cortez and his thugs.

But right there the story veers sharply sideways.

Sheriff Owens mows down a gross of cartel hoods, turning Sommerton Junction into the Somme of the border.

But then the film cuts away to Mexico where the families of the slain cartel gangsters play with pets and cook dinner and wonder when “padre” is coming home.

In a series of quick cuts, Kim focuses on the unsuspecting innocents as news arrives that an elderly American cop with an Austrian accents has lit up fathers, brothers, sons and husbands.

Women clutch sobbing children, old grandfathers vow revenge, and a beloved dog howls in the street as a mariachi band strolls past playing an upbeat tune.

Eventually the families unite and march on Sommerton Junction where there is irony, pathos, and finally the recognition that we are all one on Spaceship Earth.

Think Toy Story directed by Werner Herzog.

Some of you may notice Peter Stormare portraying the character of Burrell. In homage to Fargo, Stormare once asks for directions to “pancakes house” and is seen on eBay bidding for a wood chipper.



Diana R. Lupo brings a subtle hint of sly innocence to her role as Magnet Girl. A superhero from the Golden Age of Comics, I’m not sure of Magnet Girl’s significance to the film but she’s present nevertheless.

Two and half stars for overall differentness.


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