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| Review by Seth Merritt |
Produced by Lorenzo di Bonaventura, Brian Goldner
Written by Rhett Reese, Paul Wernick
Based on G.I. Joe by Hasbro
Directed by Jon M. Chu
Starring Bruce Willis, Dwayne Johnson, D.J. Cotrona,
Lee Byung-hun, Adrianne Palicki, Ray Park,
Jonathan Pryce, Ray Stevenson, Channing Tatum
Paramount Pictures / Rated PG-13
I’ll start off by saying I liked the 2009 G.I. Joe
movie. It had a lot of flaws but I found it entertaining.
movie. It had a lot of flaws but I found it entertaining.
Going into
this movie I had high hopes. John Chu spent a lot of time talking through
social media with The G.I. Joe collecting community and seemed to have a
good mind for what us nerds wanted to see.
this movie I had high hopes. John Chu spent a lot of time talking through
social media with The G.I. Joe collecting community and seemed to have a
good mind for what us nerds wanted to see.
The teasers all looked action
packed and I liked the casting as well.
packed and I liked the casting as well.
When the film was postponed last year to “post convert it to 3D” I started to
get a little nervous. Lots of online rumblings about the film testing
badly and plain not being good did not bode well, but I kept up hope.
get a little nervous. Lots of online rumblings about the film testing
badly and plain not being good did not bode well, but I kept up hope.
Even with the parallel to the 1987 cartoon movie of the death of Duke
being altered I still held the banner high.
being altered I still held the banner high.
I’d say the turning point came for me early on in the movie
when Cobra Commander, the main antagonist, and leader of the terrorist
organization Cobra, cut ties with a former associate by exclaiming
“Sorry Destro, you’re out of the band”. This wouldn’t be the last groan
worthy one liner. It seems the movie suffered the most due to terrible
dialogue and action zingers.
when Cobra Commander, the main antagonist, and leader of the terrorist
organization Cobra, cut ties with a former associate by exclaiming
“Sorry Destro, you’re out of the band”. This wouldn’t be the last groan
worthy one liner. It seems the movie suffered the most due to terrible
dialogue and action zingers.
The action itself was very good having been filmed John Chu
whom had previously worked on the Step Up franchise and the Justin
Beiber movie. Choreography seems to be his strong suit. The fight scenes
were crisp and hard hitting. The ninja battles were especially bad ass
to me. Again though, they were soiled by action movie cliches.
Particularly any main actor who dons any kind of mask rips it off before
or during every fight scene. Making me wonder if the mask is so
obtrusive why wear it at all.
whom had previously worked on the Step Up franchise and the Justin
Beiber movie. Choreography seems to be his strong suit. The fight scenes
were crisp and hard hitting. The ninja battles were especially bad ass
to me. Again though, they were soiled by action movie cliches.
Particularly any main actor who dons any kind of mask rips it off before
or during every fight scene. Making me wonder if the mask is so
obtrusive why wear it at all.
In all the focus on action, hardware and zingers left the
storyline very flat. Plot holes are everywhere in this movie. The main
characters who are wanted by the U.S. government are able to make it from
the Middle East to multiple US locations without any explanation how. It
seems they decide to go somewhere and are magically there in a matter
of hours or minutes. The cast has very little chemistry and the dialogue, like the plot itself, is all over the place.
storyline very flat. Plot holes are everywhere in this movie. The main
characters who are wanted by the U.S. government are able to make it from
the Middle East to multiple US locations without any explanation how. It
seems they decide to go somewhere and are magically there in a matter
of hours or minutes. The cast has very little chemistry and the dialogue, like the plot itself, is all over the place.
So much more could’ve been done with this franchise. I am an
unapologetic G.I. Joe fan and collector with a very high tolerance for
bad movies and to disappoint me is usually pretty hard to do. I found
myself wishing they had pushed it back further an retooled the script
instead of adding 3D.
unapologetic G.I. Joe fan and collector with a very high tolerance for
bad movies and to disappoint me is usually pretty hard to do. I found
myself wishing they had pushed it back further an retooled the script
instead of adding 3D.
Would I see it again? Maybe if I find a used copy of the DVD for cheap someday but I have no plans otherwise. Instead I’d rather wait for the inevitable reboot which is likely going to be the third film in the franchise.
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