CLINGER (review)

Review by Todd Sokolove

Pity the post-Heathers teenage romantic-comedy horror satire. Today’s snark has to be sharper, darker, and meaner to make a mark with millennials, let alone their parents.

Compare Fox’s brilliantly warped Scream Queens to MTV’s limp Scream reboot. While my generation certainly had their share of lame horror-comedies (My Demon Lover anyone?), we also had quite a few instant classics that, frankly, still hold up.

You’ll lose an argument with me about Night of the Comet‘s still-absent entry into the Criterion Collection.

Michael Steves’s indie feature Clinger means well, but falls fast into failed horror-comedy a la Idle Hands.

That’s a shame, since it’s obviously going for more of the successful execution of Warm Bodies or even the cult 90s zombie-teen terror of My Boyfriend’s Back.

The point being the film’s nothing new.

Boy meets girl, girl falls in love, boy obsesses over girl, girl plans to dump boy, boy accidentally decapitates himself in an elaborate guillotine-device intended to declare his love to her.  Initially unaware of his new ghostly form, the love-sick departed boyfriend goes from clingy love-fool to insidious poltergeist.

There’s pretty limited appeal to the premise, and unfortunately due to its amateurish execution, it’s likely to appeal to a non-discriminating teen audience.

Oddly, the film doesn’t skimp on the gore, which might turn off some potential viewers.

I never really found the characters compelling enough to carry the film, neither dead nor alive.  Worse yet, there’s an amateur feel to the production that haunts its spirit.

If you’re looking for a truly terrifying ghost story to scare the crap out of your teenage daughter, I’d recommend the recently released We Are Still Here instead.  Or if you really want to scare them from ever being in a successful relationship, may I recommend It Follows.  Both are love stories with 100% more style, substance and scares this Halloween.